Sonic Hates Me
by B4ndlss
Summary: Yep, Sonic Hates me... And I actually have a say T for Teens... yea R and R
1. Chapter 1

Sonic Hates B4ndlss

-B4ndlss

I'm not feeling good... so I wrote this... if this sucks please tell me... also please understand that if it sucks, it is because I am sick.

I am sick, so this might not be that good.

All Sonic character belong to SEGA and so on and so forth.

Sonic was on the computer bored, Eggman has died down since his headquarters was destroyed... again. With a sigh Sonic was online searching random things like cereal, new computers, and ice. He didn't care, he never does. After he looked up ice he typed in f-a, then one of the suggestions came up as . Intrigued Sonic clicked on the link. "Wow... look at this... I wonder what is under... uh... let's try games." thought Sonic out loud. He scrolled down the page and found a Sonic the Hedgehog category.

Nervous what it contained Sonic clicked it and found hundreds of stories about him. A lot of them were poorly written, sappy love stories. He noticed the top had a rating thingy. He switched it to mature, which was the second biggest mistake he made since he got online. The first was to go onto fanfiction. Sonic read several stories that sickened him, all of them were lemons... except for the last one that set Sonic off the most. He picked up the nearby phone.

"Hello? Tails, Sonic, get online and go onto... .net. Go to the games category and scroll down to the Sonic the Hedgehog category. No I don't know if there is a Miles Tails Prower category, can you. NO TAILS SHUT UP!! Sorry, no I am not OK. You no what, find the author B4ndlss. Yes that is a weird name. OK you there? … … Tails? Hello? Call me back when you finish reading his stuff." Sonic put down the phone and cracked his knuckles, whoever was B4ndlss was going to pay for what he wrote.

Some time later Tails called back. Anxious Sonic answered the phone. "Sonic here. Yea I know what he wrote was despicable. YOU DID WHAT???? … why? Have they read it yet? … they have? Butbutbut … yes it does involve them, but now it is much more complicated. … … I know, I know they have a right to know and confront him... wait what?. You got ahold of him? Hacked his computer? Via internet? And you wiped all of the viruses off of it? WHY?????? Oh because he has not explained himself... grand Tails, just grand. Wait where are we meeting? Uh OK...? No I don't have an account... neither does he?? Then how do we know whether or not he will show. Fine I'll see you there at 10:00 am our time..."

Sonic hung up and read the rest of B4ndlss' stories. He hated them, except for The Time Team Rocket Won. He hated that one less, so it was more like upset with it. Soon enough it morning, and Sonic woke up at his computer, where he passed out last night.

Without missing a beat Sonic found that website that Tails told him about. He made an account. He scrolled down the empty room page until he saw "B4ndlss roasting". Smiling Sonic entered it.

-Sonic01 has entered "B4ndlss roasting"-

Once he saw that he was in he got up, and began gettign ready for the 'roasting' to begin.

-RedEchidna has entered "B4ndlss roasting"-

-Rouge has entered "B4ndlss roasting"-

-XxShadowxX has entered "B4ndlss roasting"-

-B4ndlss has entered "B4ndlss roasting"-

Tails: Well morning everyone. How are you?

Sonic01: Fine, B4ndlss how could u do that?

XxShadowxX: Can't complain

RedEchidna: Same

Rouge:Tired

B4ndlss: fine I guess... except I am being called out by a bunch of nerds... ok what can I do for you?

Sonic was annoyed... 'Nerds? Doesn't he know that I am SONIC?'

Sonic01: ******** NERDS? No no no no we are not nerds.

B4ndlss: right... that is why you all have names based off of sonic the hedgehog.

Tails: sorry, we are the real deal... I am Tails... I just sent you a pic of me with this screen up.

Rouge: why would you do that Tails?

Tails: because he needs proof or else he might leave.

Sonic01: hey FAKER! NICE NAME lol

XxShadowxX: better than yours ***

B4ndlss: fine let's ASSUME that you ARE REAL. What do you what?

Sonic01: get rid of your stories!

B4ndlss: lol that is it? Pathetic

RedEchidna: To be honest, I did not read your stupid stories, I have more important things to do

Sonic01: lol yea, like being less intellegent than you already are.

RedEchidna: I'LL POUND YOU!!

Rouge: I also do not care, You killed me off, whoop-di-doo, people write about me like I am a *****... I am not, that is just vile.

-Rouge has left "B4ndlss roasting"

-RedEchidna has left B4ndlss roasting"

B4ndlss: you do realize that people write about you guys having *** with each other?

Sonic01:??

B4ndlss:***

B4ndlss: s e x

Tails: … but you are the one that make me go suicidal... s e x is one thing, but suicide is a completely

other ball game

Sonic01: you make me a jack*** to Tails, then you kill me off? How could you do that?

B4ndlss: so you like being a s e x toy sonic?

B4ndlss: …

B4ndlss: Hello?

Sonic01: NO NO NO, how could you even mention that?

XxShadowxX: nice delay

B4ndlss: The point I am tring to make is that you are overreacting

Sonic01: You are stupid

B4ndlss: whatever

Sonic01: where do you live

B4ndlss: why don't you ask Amy?

Sonic01:WHAT!?

Tails: … wasn't that harsh?

B4ndlss: idk I dun think she was

Sonic01: where do you get off insulting us?

B4ndlss: look you pathetic loser, Sonic and his people are fake, FAKE, stop pretending

XxShadowxX: He agrees with me.

B4ndlss: you have a gamers name right? What games you play?

XxShadowxX: …?

B4ndlss: … you don't play games do you?

XxShadowxX: Warcraft 3?

B4ndlss: so you are admitting that you guys are a bunch of fake gamers/nerds?

-PinkSonicLover has entered "B4ndlss roasting"-

B4ndlss: Hello Amy ^^

PinkSonicLover: WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY SONNIKU!!!

B4ndlss: … Sonic01... you deal with her

Sonic01: nuh uh she is your problem ***

B4ndlss: sigh

Sonic01: SEE WHAT YOU HAVE CAUSED?

B4ndlss: an annoyance that I am about to abbandon?

Tails: I know where you live...

B4ndlss: creepy

Tails: we can beat you up...

B4ndlss: I can call the cops on you guys

PinkSonicLover: I'LL KILL YOU FOR WHAT YOU HAVE DONE

B4ndlss: sigh... and what have I done?

PinkSonicLover: what?

B4ndlss: sigh

-B4ndlss has left "B4ndlss roasting"-

Sonic01: wow what a *****

PinkSonicLover: what did he do?

Tails: …

XxShadowxX: just forget it, Sonic, you are a loser

PinkSonicLover: Don't you ever say that about Sonikku

-XxShadowxX has left "B4ndlss roasting"-

Sonic01: Tails where does he live?

**Sorry if this sucks, I am stuck in bed due to illness, and I was bored.**

**Ok I am sorry if you can't unread this. g'night**


	2. Chapter 2

**Sonic Hates Me**

**by B4ndlss**

**Note: being sick really does free up a lot of time.**

**If this sucks it is b/c I am sick,**

**All of the Sonic characters belong to SEGA**

**thank you dark_prower for reviewing all of my stories... it was nice.**

**Chapter 2... wow I cannot believe I am writing a chapter 2, but it seems that some people like it... yay ^^**

Sonic and Tails arrived in the Human world rather unscaythed, except God was mad at them for something and Chris joined them... somehow. Of course they did not know of this until they exited the worp portal and there was Chris.

"No No No No Sonic, I cannot follow you to his place if Chris is coming along" Tails whispered into Sonic's ear. "Lose him, or else you will never get your way."

"SONIC!! MY GOODNESS I HAVE MISSED YOU!!" Chirs screamed with joy as he tackled Sonic in the biggest hug ever known to man. "I THOUGHT I LOST YOU FOREVER!!"

"Awww crap, this is the gayest thing I have ever seen, I am soo glad he is not in love with me." muttered Tails. Tails moved behind some bushes and headed up the street, fortunately for him, his calculations were dead on, they were on the street that B4ndlss lives on.

Chris let up on the hug and switched his focus to Tails. "Where are you going? We have so much to catch up on. Come on let's go play." Chris began to follow Tails, to which he got the harshest rejection since Sonic left.

"Go away Chris, I hate you... there, now leave like a crybaby that you are. Sonic, here is a comm-link so I can talk to you from a distance, because I doubt you can get Chris to leave." He notioned to Chris who was again tackling Sonic, but this time he was crying.

Sonic and Chris made their way up the street, Chris blabbing on and on about how much he missed Sonic and how he was so glad to see him again. Sonic put the mike into his ear as they approached the house. Tails crackled through "I am in position, please don't give a comm-link to Chris, but knowing you, you will. If so, turn off you mike until the signal is given." Sonic could barely hear Tails, but he understood.

As if right on cue: "Hey Sonic can I use a comm-link, please, please, pleeeeease?". Sonic could not stand such cruel torture any longer than "can". But before he turned over the spare comm-link that he smuggled just in case Tails forgot one, he turned off his own, then passed the extra to Chris.

"OOO YAY!!!" Chris put the comm-link on and turned up the volume like Sonic had recommended.

"!!!!!!!!" came Tails blasting through the comm-link, fortunately for Tails, Chris turned it up to the max volume, thus making his pain much, much, MUCH more enjoyable.

By the time Chris regained composure Sonic was already knocking at the target door.

B4ndlss opened the door, and was surprised to see Sonic and Chris... 'Did he think me as to be gay??' B4ndlss thought. "Morning gents, I am sorry I was only expecting Sonic... wait here please, so I can fix something up for..." "Chris Thor-" Chris started. "Yes, master Chris. Please hold for one minute."

B4ndlss ran upstairs to his room and grabbed his old fencing blade "not perfect, but it might kill him..." thought B4ndlss outloud. Once B4ndlss opened the door again he saw Chris trying to peek through the peephole... which was not possible. B4ndlss raised his blade. "DIE!! DIE!! DIE!!" he roared as he began to mercilessly beat the crap out of Chris.

Tails watched as the late teen began mauling the kid. "!!!! Sonic, you might want to reconsider this, this is just too good... !!!1337!!!!"

Once B4ndlss tired of beating up Chris he turned to Sonic... "uhm... why are you a... cartoon?"

"WHAT!!"

"You know, a cartoon. I am real here, yet the two of you are cartoons... you even have the black outlines."

"...WHAT!!"

B4ndlss sighed, "Tell Tails to get in here as well, I don't think he will be happy that you left him outside"

"Two things... one: how did you know Tails was here... and two: he will not come here if Chris is here..."

"I have an idea." mused B4ndlss

B4ndlss was sitting on a couch with Tails next to him and Sonic across from him.

"Man, Sonic, don't you think we should be thanking B4ndlss? I mean Chris does make quite a nice fire." Tails ventured.

"Well I guess it's ok then... hey thanks for the drinks and the lovely fire, but it is getting late, and we really need to get going." Sonic and Tails said their goodbyes, and left without any commotion.

One B4ndlss closed the door behind them Sonic looked over to Tails "You planted the charges?"

"Yep, we have five minutes until you and I get our revenge.... except... I already got mine against Chris." Tails laughed. "I guess It was a good thing for me to come over here last night and hide the demo charges... heh how nice."

**Look, I know this is probably not as well written as the first chapter... but oh well.**

**I hope everyone liked the chapter... I am really sorry it is subpar of my goal. But that is what happens when I am sick.**

**G'night**


	3. Chapter 3

Sonic Hates Me

by: B4ndlss

**I am no longer sick... with the flu. I have no desire to write this now that I have just written such filth... (see last 2 chapters) this will be like the last 2 chapters unless I decide to care about this story before I finish typing. **

**OK PLEASE REVIEW, IT IS NOT HARD. I REALLY WANT REVIEWS FROM INSULTS TO PRAISES. PLEASE, PLEASE REVIEW.**

**All sonic characters belong to their respective owners**

**Ok, here it goes. Chapter 3**

**chapter 3: BOOM?**

Tails and Sonic walked down the street and into the portal that they came from. Once they were on the other side, Sonic began to wish that they did not enter the portal to see the pretty explosion. Fortunately for him, Tails managed to set up a live feed... through a portal. Sonic didn't understand. But then again he never did. He just smiled and nodded as they headed for a monitor.

B4ndlss sighed as he took a swig from his coke-cola. Sonic and Tails were real, it was all real. WHY ON EARTH IS THAT POSSIBLE!! He kept thinking and thinking and thinking on the couch in the same spot as he was just earlier. Chris was smoldering in the fireplace, his bones were black and could not be distinguished from the soot that covered the bottom of the fireplace. He may have noticed a high pitched ring from outside. But then again he may have never known that Sonic and Tails were alive...

With a loud click B4ndlss' house blew apart in a massive explosion. Flaming 2 x 4's went flying across the hill here the house was built. Causing fires to be set. The two houses next to B4ndlss' were also torn apart. Toys and other items of interest scattered the hillsides, the streets and other houses. All in all the whole hill was set ablaze. Fire burned and cut through the other houses on the street. Fuel rolled into the street causing the pavement itself to look like it was on fire. B4ndlss was gone, there was no way he could survive such an attack. It was impossible for him to survive at the epicenter when people all across the street burned to death in the conflagration.

Sonic watched the beauty as it unfolded. He smiled. He loved the devastation it caused, he loved Tails' handiwork. He leaned back and laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed.

**I know that you were expecting more, but … well TOO BAD... please review, it is not hard, not hard at all. I really want to hear from you all. -B4ndlss**

**wait... if I was blown to bits... then how am I here to write about it... hmmmmmm**

**(no there will not be a 4th chapter... even though I could write one.)**

**-B4ndlss**


End file.
